I found this question on Quora.
I almost skipped this question because many other answers said the most important thing: “Do not use the Cry It Out method”. But if someone is going to do something bad, I hate to see them do it even worse because they don’t know how. I think the consequences of explaining this are overall positive though they may lead some people to think they should use the Cry It Out method.
I did not answer the question as stated because every age is the wrong age for the Cry It Out method.
Here’s my answer:
I agree with the consensus of answers that the cry it out method is cruel.
But if you’re going to do it, make sure you do it in a safe manner (though I believe even this to be misguided).
The best way I’ve heard of is to console the child when it first cries, checking it for any needs it may have. On the second event, let the child cry for a short time, then console it again. On the third event, let the child cry for a slightly longer time, then console it again. And so on.
This is meant to teach the child that they are going to be cared for eventually and they need to learn to be patient. I suspect it has the opposite effect, of teaching the child that if no one has shown up, they should probably cry some more. But it’s better than simply leaving a crying child alone.
Meanwhile, in countries where parents commonly console their children, children are reportedly better developed and stable. Apparently humans do well with human contact.